The Third Agreement

The Third Agreement is Don't Make Assumptions....

The problem with making assumptions is that we believe they are the truth....

We make assumptions about what others are thinking and doing --- then we blame them and react by sending emotional poison with our word....

We make assumptions, we misunderstand, we take it personally, and we end up creating a whole big drama for nothing...

assumptions set us up for suffering....

We make assumptions that everyone sees life the way we do. We assume that others think the way we think, feel the way we feel, judge the way we judge, and abuse the way we abuse. This is the biggest assumption that humans make. And this is why we have a fear of being ourselves around others. Because we think that others will judge us, victimize us, blame us and abuse us like we do to ourselves. So even before others have a chance to reject us, we have already rejected ourselves....

We don't need to justify love; it is either there or it is not. Real love is accepting other people the way they are without trying to change them....

The way to keep yourself from making assumptions is to ask questions....

The day you stop making assumptions you will communicate cleanly and clearly, free of emotional poison....

What really will make the difference is action...

When you transform the dream, magic just happens in your life. What you need comes to you easily because spirit moves freely through you. This is the mastery of intent, the mastery of spirit, the mastery of love, the mastery of gratitude, the mastery of life. This is the goal of the Toltec. This is the path to personal freedom....

Taken from The Four Agreements: A Toltec Wisom Book by Don Miguel Ruiz, pp. 68-74

This agreement will be so very important for me. I am the queen of future trippin'. Staying in the "here and now" will be very important for me. I really like the line love is accpeting of people without trying to change them. I have spent so much time trying to change everyone to fit my world and all I need to do is let those things go and change me. My actions will be the most important thing in the world. Just as a million sorries for drinking fall on deaf hears, but my family notices my choice to be sober everyday, so will other things happen. Time to stop making apologies and start taking action to prevent future harm to others by trying to impose my world on them. What actions have I taken today to accept those around me as they are?

What Is Love?

I am reading an old classic right now, "The Road Less Traveled" by M. Scott Peck, M.D. This book has a very interesting definition of love. It has gotten me thinking about relationship I have and those I had. There are many where the word love has been used, but based on this new definition there was no love at all. It has given me new insight into what contitutes a healthy relationship. The definition Scott Peck gives reads: "The will to extend one's self for thepurpose of nuturing one's own or another's spiritual growth." Using that definition love becomes an action rather than a feeling. When I reflected on relationships and compared them to this definition I could honestly say that there have beena and still are relationships where I would have said love existed but really does not. The relationship with my husband and kids have taken on new meaning and I can honestly say that love exists in these realtionships.

Love

Rhonda had been taught love and loving require doing and getting. If you do this, you will get love. If you don't do this, you will lose love. She learned that love was a bargin, when in fact, love is a principle. It is a state of being that we experience as what we do and how we do it. Because most of the people in Rhonda's life inflicted pain on her, she closely associated love with pain, whether mental, emotional or physical. Love hurt Rhonda. As a result, when she loved someone, she would hurt herself rather than hurt them.

Taken from "Yesterday, I Cried" by Iyanla Vanzant

I grew up with much the same idea of Love. In this program I have learned a new way to love and be loved. I have learned that my Higher Power is love. Love begins with being able to honestly look at myself and all that I have done and all that has happened. I had to come to believe that I am whole, lacking nothing just as God wants me to be. Once I came to believe that I could love and be loved. By placing my faith, my life, life and all it's outcomes in my Higher Powers hands the only left was love. Like it tells us in 1 Cor 13, Love does not have strings attached. It just is. Life takes on a whole new meaning when one understands love. I am grateful for a relationship with my Higher Power and the fellowship of Alcoholics Anonymous working in my life to teach me the true meaning of love.

Tolerance

Today's Thought

You are reading from the book Twenty Four Hours a Day Hardcover (24 Hours).

A.A. Thought for the Day

Another of the mottoes of A.A. is "Live and Let Live." This, of course, means tolerance of people who think differently than we do, whether they are in A.A. or outside of A.A. We cannot afford the luxury of being intolerant or critical of other people. We do not try to impose our wills on those who differ from us. We are not "holier than thou." We do not have all the answers. We are not better than other good people. We live the best way we can and we allow others to do likewise. Am I willing to live and let live?

Meditation for the Day

"And this is life eternal, that we may know Thee, the only true God." Learning to know God as best you can draws the eternal life nearer to you. Freed from some of the limitations of humanity, you can grow in the things that are eternal. You can strive for what is real and of eternal value. The more you try to live in the consciousness of the unseen world, the gentler will be your passing into it when the time comes for you to go. This life on earth should be largely a preparation for the eternal life to come.

Prayer for the Day

I pray that I may live each day as though it were my last. I pray that I may live my life as though it were everlasting.

This program teaches that love and tolerance of others is our code. That is something I try to live daily. I have found that my Higher Power speaks to me through other people and that those other people may be the very folks that some shun. I have to remember that I am no better, no worse than the next person I will encounter. Each of us was created by a loving Higher Power and we are exactly who he wants us to be. I do live each day as it were my last for ultimately I have only today. Tomorrow is never a guarentee. Thanks to all of you, for it is really you who have taught me what tolerance is by your very actions of accepting me, just as I am, no matter what stupid mistakes and choices I make, no matter what comes out of my mouth. By following your example I have learned to love myself and as my Anna always says, God is love and if I stay in touch with my Higher Power than love is what comes forth from me.

The Twelve Rewards of Sobriety

THE TWELVE REWARDS OF SOBRIETY

o Faith instead of despair.
o Courage instead of fear.
o Hope instead of desperation.
o Peace of mind instead of confusion.
o Real friendships instead of loneliness.
o Self-respect instead of self-contempt.
o Self-confidence instead of helplessness.
o A clean conscious instead of a sense of guilt.
o The respect of others instead of their pity and contempt.
o A clean pattern of living instead of a hopeless existence.
o The love and understanding of our families instead of their doubts and fears.
o The freedom of a happy life instead of the bondage of an alcoholic obsession.

The rewards of sobriety are unimaginable. I never would have believed life could be this good. One of my favorites is the true friendships. I have met some incredible people, all because I made a decision to put the drink down.

Love and Acceptance

I will not hurt anyone today by any comment. I will truthfully share the love and acceptance I have been given.

Today's thought is:

If one is going to be truthful, one has to be very tender. --Florida Scott-Maxwell

Honesty is always the best policy, right? We glibly recite that saying, but it's important to reevaluate its meaning when we are eager to correct or direct the actions of the other people. If being honest will unnecessarily harm them, perhaps being silent is better.

The program is helping us restructure our lives. We discover that many former, automatic responses no longer fit who we desire to be. That means we have to try new, less-practiced behaviors, such as being honest without being harsh or critical.

Learning tenderness is possible. With the help of this program and one another, we are learning to express the acceptance and love that have been given to us by our Higher Power. Giving away what we have been given is sharing the truth absolutely.

I will not hurt anyone today by any comment. I will truthfully share the love and acceptance I have been given.

I needed to hear this today. It was a crazy, long day at work. I work in a field that can be very challenging at times. Yet I work with those who are the most disadvantage in our society. They also are the most accepting, truthful and loving group too. Sometimes I forget that if I want those qualities than I must live those qualities. When I chose not to live those qualities than the people around me feed off my negative energy and that's what I get on return. This reading was a good reminder to me and just what I needed to hear.

Acknowledgement

I acknowledge that there are things that I do that are not in my best interest. I forgive myself for doing the things I have done that are not in my best interest.

I acknowledge that, most of the time, I have no conscious awareness of the things I do that are not in my best interest. I forgive myself for being unaware of the things that I do that are not in my own best interest.

I acknowledge that when I have been consciously aware that my actions were not in my best interest, I chose, in response to the fear I experienced, to continue the course of action. I forgive my self for choosing in response to fear.

I acknowledge that I have been an active, although unconscious, participation is the creation of pain and discomfort in my life and the lives of others. I forgive myself for unconscious participation in the creation of pain and discomfort in my life and the life of others.

I acknowledge that there are occassions on which I have been an active conscious participant in the creation of pain and discomfort in my life and the lives of others. I forgive myself for conscious participation in the creation of pain and discomfort in my life and the life of others.

I acknowledge that I have made conscious choices and decisions, being aware that the choices or decisions were not in my best interest, but in pursuit of monetary gain or reward. I forgive myself for placing the value of money before my best interest.

I acknowledge that when I experience fear, I do not tell the truth. I forgive myself for not telling the truth under all circumstances.

I acknowledge that I allowed myself to believe things about myself that are not true. I forgive myself for believing things that were not true about myself.

I acknowledge that I have been angry with myself for not being able to change my behavior. I forgive myself for being angry with myself.

I acknowledge that I have been angry with others and held them responsible for my own inability to change myself. I forgive myself for being angry with others. I forgive myself for being angry with others for my actions and my life.

I acknowledge that I am a child of God. I acknowledge that I am valuable, worthy and loveable. I acknowledge that God is the source and center of my life. I acknowledge that only God can chance the false beliefs I have held about myself. I acknowledge that my acknowledgment of God can and will heal the wounds I have eperienced as a result of false beliefs, fear based choices and decisions, and ignorance of God's sovereignty in my life. I forgive myself totally and unconditionally. I know ask the Holy Spirit of God to heal my wounds, to eliminate all false beliefs I have held, and to open my heart to true unconditional love.

For all that I have recieved and all that is to come, I am so grateful.

Taken from "Yesterday, I Cried" by Iyanla Vanzant

This part of the book said a lot to me. I had struggled with coming to that place where I could love myself. What I dicovered was that I was still kicking myself in the ass for things that I had done when I was using. I forgot to forgive myself. Once I was able to do that, I was able to love myself. I was able to see that I was another child of my Higher Power, no better or no worse than any other. If I could forgive others than I could surely forgive myself. That is the point where I discovered that love has to start with me and my relationship with my Higher Power and than it can grow and spread to others. Once I could accept myself for who I was and admit that I was good just because God made me, than I was able to accept the love others were giving to me. It was a huge turning point in my life. Thanks to the grace of a Higher Power and the fellowship of Alcoholics Anonymous I have learned to do these things and to accept and give forgivenes and love. The result is a life that has purpose and meaning and is worth living to the fullest everyday.

Sand Dollars

Legend of the Sand Dollar

Version One:

The legend of the Sand Dollar
There's a pretty little legend
That I would like to tell
Of the birth and death of Jesus
Found in this lowly shell.

If you examine closely,
You'll see that you find here
Four nail holes and a fifth one
Made by a Roman's spear.

On one side the Easter lily,
Its center is the star
That appeared unto the shepherds
And led them from afar.

The Christmas poinsettia,
Etched on the other side
Reminds us of His birthday,
Our happy Christmastide.

Now break the center open,
And here you will release
The five white doves awaiting
To spread Good will and peace.

This simple little symbol,
Christ left for you and me
To help us spread His Gospel
Through all eternity.

While on vacation we hiked into a place called Ledbetter Point. We walked on the beach and found lots of sand dollars. I had fun sharing this story with my family and thought I would share it with you all.....enjoy!

PS Happy Birthday to my friend, my confidant, my companion, my partner, my Honey Buns! I Love You!

Where does Love Come From?

Not asking for what I wanted. Being afraid to tell people what I was really feeling. Not speaking up for myself if I thought it would make someone mad at me. People-pleasing and self-denial. Never feeling like I had done enough, or that I was good enough. Always needing someone else to determine my self-worth. Each of the little piles had a different shape or form, but at the core they were all the same. I was still looking for love.

Taken from "Yesterday, I Cried" by Iyanla Vanzant

This program has taught me so much about love. I know now that love has to start with me. When I can be honest about who I am and what I need I have a beginning. My Higher Power will guide me if only I accept who I am and work towards become who he wants me to be. I spent many years trying to buy, bagain and cheat love into my life. All I ever got was more pain and feelings of worthlessnes. Now that I am willing to look in the mirror and recognize that I am a child of God and he made me just the way I'm suppose to, I have found love. By working the steps this program suggests I have learned how to love others and how to be loved. I have for the first time in my life true friendships and true love. I am able to recognize that other persons are they way that God created them to be and to accept and love them, rather than try and change them. It hads made my marriage deeper and stronger and I know that I have a few people I can always count on to be there when I need them. The folks I used to call friends are not here for me and they never really were before, they have not yet learned to love themselves and have no idea what love really is. I thank my Higher Power everyday for the gift of life and the ablility to give and receive love.

Things To Remember

This should probably be taped to your bathroom mirror where one could read it every day. You may not realize it, but it's 100% true.

1. There are at least two people in this world that you would die for.

2. At least 15 people in this world love you in some way.

3. The only reason anyone would ever hate you is because they want to be just like you.

4. A smile from you can bring happiness to anyone, even if they don't like you.

5. Every night, SOMEONE thinks about you before they go to sleep.

6. You mean the world to someone.

7. You are special and unique.

8. Someone that you don't even know exists loves you.

9. When you make the biggest mistake ever, something good comes from it.

10. When you think the world has turned its back on you take another look.

11. Always remember the compliments you received. Forget about the rude remarks.

Always remember....when life hands you Lemons, ask for LEMONADE call me over!

Good friends are like stars........You don't always see them, But you know they are always there

Someone very dear to me sent this to me. I didn't bother to read it until today. I'm glad I did. I was having one of those unidentifiable down kinda days today and reading this really put things into perspective for me today. I made a copy and put it on my bedroom mirror. I was prompted to forget the feeling I have and remember all that is right and good about today and all that I have to be grateful for. That list is a lot longer than the negative one I had been working on. Thanks Mable.

The Path of Love & Joy

Today's thought is:

Through many dangers, toils and snares, I have already come. 'Tis grace that hath brought me safe thus far and grace will lead me home.'--John Newton

Today and always, let joy be your compass. When choosing a direction in life, choose the path of your heart. Do what you love, follow your bliss.

Fun is an underestimated emotion in our culture. We are told as children, "If you waste time having fun, you won't get anything serious accomplished." Yet most successful people describe their work as being incredibly joyful. An office that sings with laughter is always more productive. As one executive remarked, "The more I enjoy my work, the more efficient I become."

Joy and laughter improve the quality of our relationships. Couples who lighten up rarely split up. Laughing at a difficult situation fosters detachment and understanding. It is only when we get too serious that trouble arises.

Since love is the highest _expression of the Divine, following that path of love and joy will lead you to God-consciousness. What more is there?

Our vacation comes to an end today. I plan to take the love and joy we experienced with me and find ways for it to continue. It was a wonderful week, filled with joy and love......a few of the roses had thorns, but they are still beautiful. Last night I had a wonderful time. I was able to visit with Tammy, a wonderful friend, who has moved in pursuit of her love and joy. I was also able to meet a fellow blogger(Phyllis), and she was full of love and joy. I will have a picture up tomorrow, or you can check her page (there is a link in my blog roll). We had a wonderful dinner and made plans to meet again next month. I am renewed and ready to return to work with a new sense of love and joy. My husband and I refound our love and joy this vacation as we celebrated our 21st anniversary (we got to watch the sunset on the ocean that evening). This trip I was able to reflect on all that is good in my life. My gratitude list is long, and when that is the case, there is lots of love and joy. I am especially grateful to have a relationship with a power greater than myself. When that relationship is right you can't help but be filled with love and joy!

Mothers

Mothers are very important to children. They provide the lifeblood, the mind energy, and the "soul food" that every child needs in order to flourish. Fathers show us how to survive. Mothers teach us how to blossom and flourish. The mother must teach, nurture, guide, and provide the spiritual support system that the soul requires to unfold. When a child does not have a mother, some portion of the mind, the soul, and the life of the child remains in a constant state of yearning and want. What the child wants is to be feed and loved in a way that only a mother can love. Only a mother can bring forth the grace, mercy, beauty, and gentleness of the spirit. The spirit of God. The spirit of mothering energy is present in every woman. Whether she knows it or not, a woman is a mother, simply by virtue of the fact that she is a woman.....

When a woman does not know she is a mother, or how to be a mother, the children around the house become lost. She is not sensitive to them or there needs. Her words are spoken harshly. Her actions are abrupt and abrasive. She is authoritarian. She knows the words of mothering but not the grace. The grace of the mother's love will break the rules, when it is necessary, in order to nourish a child. In the face of an authoritarian mother, a childs growth is stunted. When a child has an unfolded heart, it is too difficult, too dificult for her to express how she feels, or what she needs. Unexpresed feelings and need lead to anger and fear.

When a woman has not touched the part of her spirit that is God, she cannot offer God to her children. She cannot give love, perhaps because she has not received love. She follows the rules that say that love, loving, and the mercy of love are weaknesses. When a woman with a closed heart is placed in the role of a mother, she can't be anything but weak.

Taken from "Yesterday, I cried" by Iyanla Vanzant

Today my son turned 16. He is my baby. I have spent a lot of this past week refelcting on motherhood and how well I did, or didn't do the things a mother is suppose to do. I grew up with a mother just like the one described above, one who has not touched the part of of her spirit that is God. I tried to do better, but when one doesn't grow up with those things it is difficult. I did fond that part of my spirit that is God for a long time when my kids were little. When my son was about 8 the disease began to rob me of that spirit of God within me. Somehow my children seem to have been blessed with that Spirit. They are confident and have a spiritual support system. I am grateful for my recovery and to my Higher Power for helping me to provide that for my kids and for the gifts I have received.

An Attitude of Love

"There is no difficulty that enough love will not conquer; no disease that enough love will not heal; no door that enough love will not open."


This is so true. I have been concentrating on this principle and it is amazing what I can accomplish with an attitude of love and acceptance of people, places and things as being exactly how they are supposed tp be at this moment

Loving Truth

Today's thought is:

Loving Truth

Since it is truth that sets us free - free from our addiction and free from crippling fear - we come to love this truth, even when it hurts. It was mainly our fear that kept us from recognizing the truth about ourselves. We needed help and support from a Higher Power before we could face reality. Now that we are sustained by the AA program, we can devote our time and energy to striving for truth in all that we think, say, and do.

Our devotion to truth may bring us into conflict with those around us. What we need to remember is that we are not responsible for convincing anyone else of what we believe to be true. We are honest about where we are, but we do not expect or demand agreement from anyone else. Since each of us has a different perspective, we can only know the truth as we each understand it. Loving truth means that we acknowledge it to be too big for any one of us to grasp completely.

The truth is something I have been really working on Lately. It has been a struggle because my nature is to lie and cheat whenever possible. Learning a new way is always hard. I have found that for the most part it is true.....the truth sets me free. Being truthful to myself was the first step. Until I could be honest about who I was and what I had done, there was no chance of me being honest with anyone else. Now that I have become honest about myself it is much easier to be honest with others, even when the truth is painful. The challenge lies in being truthful, yet minimizing the hurt and pain that some truths can bring. I imagine it will take a lifetime to master this skill, and I am only a beginner. For today, I can do the next right and truthful thing, thanks to the blessing of the program and all of you.

Love

When you need to be loved, you take love wherever you can find it. When you are desparate to be loved, feel love, know love, you seek out what you think life should look like. When you find love, or what you think love is, you will lie, kill, and steal to keep it. But learning about real love comes from within. It cannot be given. It cannot be taken away. It grows from your sense of self. It grows from your ability to recreate within yourself, and for yourself, the essence of loving experiences you have had in your life. When you have not had loving experiences, or when you do not have a sense of self, the true essence of love eludes you. Instead, you hold onto, reach out to, and find yourself embroiled in, your mistaken beliefs about yourself and love.

Taken from "Yesterday I cried" by Iyanla Vanzant

So true. Until I learned to accept myself rather than except myself things didn't change. When I began to be comfortable in my own skin I began to be able to give and accept love from others, a healthy, unconditional love. I have relationships now that never existed before and I am filled with love and able to accept others for who they are (well most of the time anyway)!

Love and Spirituality

Children often learn about spirituality and things of a spiritual nature under a cloud of suspence and fear....They are definitely taught they are sinners. They are taught what not to do. They are also taught that if they commit the forbidden acts, God will get them. They are taught about a cruel and punishing God. A God who is displeased with you and most of what you do unless you follow certain "prescriptions." Few children are taught that they are not separate from God, or that it is possible to develop an intimate relationship with God. They believe that God is somewhere "out there," separate and apart from you, waiting for you to make a wrong move...She figured out very early in life that she was bad, and something bad was gonna happen to her...Bad children expect bad things to happen to them. They expect to be punished...She learned about love through pain, abusively, neglegently inflicted, and unnecessary pain. She learned about God in the midst of fear. She learned to expect pain as an ingredient to being loved. She learned that people who claimed to love you can cause, and will ignor, your pain. She learned through the action of her "loved ones" to expect that an act of love would be preceded by the impostion of pain...She learned that if you do the wrong thing, those who love you will hurt you. And no matter how badly you hurt, or what you have done, if you bear the pain of love silently, you can hope against hope that someone will, one day, love you enough to hurt you again.

Taken from "Yesterday I Cried" by Iyanla Vanzant

I have been struggling lately with love and spirituality. I never got clear messages about either growing up. I really identified with what this book said. That is exactly the message I grew up with. When I got to AA I began to learn a new way. I began to understand that God is not like that at all. I came to learn what love was suppose to look like. It has been so easy for me to have that love and for my spirituality to grow in the rooms of AA. Where it got tough was the part about practicing these principles in "all our affairs" , as step 12 suggests we do. The hardest place of all has proven to be at home. After some struggle, some reading and some inventory I have come to the realization that I have allowed my relationships at home to be driven by self-centered fear. I have forgotten that my only job is to give love freely and be of service. I have forgotten that kind of love that overlooks shortcomings at home, and have allowed my fear to keep me focused on the faults of others. In just one evening of remebering that love and that giving without the expectation of anything in return, relationships have already improved. The problems are no where near being all solved, but at least I feel like the war is over. Thanks so much for holding that mirror up and pointing me in the right direction (you know who you are, chickie). Love ya the mostest!

Life Is For Living

Life is for Living
by Author Unknown

Life is a gift we're given each and every day.
Dream about tomorrow, but live for today.
To live a little, you've got to love a whole lot.
Love turns the ordinary into the extraordinary.

Life's a journey always worth taking.
Take time to smell the roses... and tulips...
and daffodils... and lilacs... and sunflowers...

Count blessings like children count stars.
The secret of a happy life isn't buried in a treasure chest...
it lies within your heart.
It's the little moments that make life big.

Don't wait.
Make memories today.
Celebrate your life!

When I waslked through the doors of AA I was given a choice for the first time I can remember to live life. I try everyway but the AA way and I only got glimpses of what life could be like. When I finally made the descion to live life it came with hurt, pain, shame, tugh times, struggles and many more of the things I'd experienced all my years. Than I learned it came with some things I knew nthing or very little about and those things made me come back today and I pray everday. Those things are love, joy, freedom, serenity, peace, humility, sharing and many more.......Today I choose to live life to the fullest because I see it as a gift from a power greater than myself. Thanks to all of you for showing me the path to life.

Did You Find Joy?

Did you find joy?

"The future, higher evolution will belong to those who live in joy, who share joy, and who spread joy."
-- Torkom Saraydarian

Joy, as the energy of love, is the highest vibration on this planet. Everything in the universe is energy; it can be measured and reduced to vibrational frequencies. It’s a universal law that as we think and feel we vibrate, and as we vibrate we attract. When we are in the high joy vibration, we attract what is for our greater good.

The Ancient Egyptians saw Joy as a sacred responsibility. They believed that upon their death, the God Osiris would ask them two questions: "Did you bring Joy?" and "Did you find Joy?" Those who answered ‘yes’ could continue their journey into the afterlife.

For at least the next week or two, ask yourself these two questions each and every day: Did I bring joy? Did I find joy?

"Man loves because he is Love. He seeks Joy, for he is Joy. He thirsts for God for he is composed of God and he cannot exist without Him."
-- Sathya Sai Baba

Today I have been clean and sober nine months. This time around it was much more difficult to get to this place. I believe it is because the first time through I sought the easier, softer way. Ultimately it did not work as I traveled from 18 months to zero without even really realizing what had happened. The biggest difference this time around is honesty. I am learning to be honest with others, but mostly with myself. I have faced fears rather than run from them or find a new way to bury them. One would think it is difficult to find joy when there have been many struggles and pain. However, it has been quite the oppisite. I have traveled throuh more difficulties and pain in this nine months than I did in 18 months before, but I have found way more peace, joy and Love than I ever thought possible. The last three months have been incredibly diffficult, but still I have found love and I have loved others, which is something I have found very little of before now. There are too many to thank for the support, example and strength.

Today I am grateful for:

• The love I have found in my family: Mike, Kim Steve, and Anna
• The love of true friends, something I never had before
• The support and family I have found in AA
• The ability to fulfill dreams instead of watching them pass by
• sobriety
• The ability to survive trials and tribulations
• ENOUGH, I have enough of all that I need
• The ability to share that which has been given me: materialistically, spiritually, sobriety and Love
• The ability to reach out and experience new things: I have been blessed to be able to travel and have met some incredible people (My Anna Poo; Jamesy Baby, Tom, Suzan, Meg) and many more to come
• Life today.

Conflict With Kids

Conflicts with the kids? Relax!

“Family life! The United Nations is child's play compared to the tugs and splits and need to understand and forgive in any family.”
-- May Sarton

Faced with a child (or a person of any age, for that matter) who is angry or rebellious? Consider the guidance from Vimala McClure:
“To discover what my child needed, a deep, yielding receptivity was vital. The temptation is to become more and more rigid, but the more you do, the less you understand. When faced with a child who is testing your resolve, relax and yield ….

“As a parent, the frustration of not knowing how to fill a need that cannot be articulated can be overwhelming. Often we direct the rage that stems from that frustration toward the child, which serves to distance us even further, making it impossible for the child to open up to us. To get to this type of receptivity, a practice of conscious relaxation is a must.”

“Those who have children can become masters of patience, endurance, and steadfastness, because children will test you at every turn. …The way to make our children patient and loving is to be that way ourselves.”
-- Eknath Easwaran

I am grateful for the two children that I have been blessed to help raise, even though there are times when they drive me crazy.

What Is Love?

What is love?

"When mystics use the word love, they use it very carefully -- in the deeply spiritual sense, where to love is to know; to love is to act. If you really love, from the depths of your Consciousness, that love gives you a native wisdom. You perceive the needs of others intuitively and clearly, with detachment from any personal desires; and you know how to act creatively to meet those needs, dexterously surmounting any obstacle that comes in the way. Such is the immense, driving power of love."
-- Eknath Easwaran

"Therefore, when I say that ‘I love,’ it is not I who love, but in reality Love who acts through me. Love is not so much something I do as something that I am. Love is not a doing but a state of being - a relatedness, a connectedness to another mortal, an identification with her or him that simply flows within me and through me, independent of my intentions or my efforts."
-- Robert A. Johnson

"When you are aware that you are the force that is Life, anything is possible. Miracles happen all the time, because those miracles are performed by the heart. The heart is in direct communion with the human soul, and when the heart speaks, even with the resistance of the head, something inside you changes; your heart opens another heart, and true love is possible."
-- Don Miguel Ruiz