First we acknowledge that we harbor negative feelings. Instead of ignoring them, we become willing to take them into our inner being and accept them....
we call up our courage to respond in a different manner. We put the focus on ourselves and our feelings instead of the outside forces that have hurt us. We are creating a buffer zone that keeps us from acting out in a damaging way to the perpetrator, or retreating into fantasies and revenge.
The writer Malachy McCourt said, "Resentment is like taking poison and waiting for the other person to die."
We take responsibility for handling our feelings and move on to the next step of transforming the energy We have been harmed once by the harm-doer;
We don't have to victimize ourselves by being held in thrall to our emotions.
When we have been the victims of harm, we isolate ourselves. We tend to curl up into a little ball of self-pity and separate ourselves from others.......there are many people who suffer as we suffer. We reach out to take them and to take in their feelings and send out healing to them. We reunite with the human race.
We are not depleting our energy, because it returns to us a hundred-fold.
Transforming the negative energy within ourselves paves the way to forgive the victimizer.
Taken from Heart of Forgiveness by Madeline Ko-I Bastis
This hit me very powerfully, especially since this past week has been a lesson in holding on to negative energy until it harmed me and those around me that I love the most. Just ackowledging my feelings is a huge step for me. I am spending time now just sitting with my feelings and ackowledging that they exist. I am slowly feeling so much better since I have made the choice to leave my place of isolation and join the human race.
