Spring in the Mountains

Spent a lovely day in the mountains today. It started out raining and we almost didn't go. I'm so glad we changed our minds and went anyway. We drove and drove......My hunny wondered around looking for mushrooms. I wandered around looking for cool rocks. He didn't find any elusive morels and I didn't find my fairy crosses. But we did find some cool rocks and we saw tons of wild turkey, elk and deer. Along with evidence a moose add been by recently. It was so peaceful and we got to spend some real quality time just talking about life, hopes, dreams, all the stuff we rarely have time for.

Desiderata

Desiderata

Go placidly amid the noise and haste and remember
what peace there may be in silence.
As far as possible without
surrender be on good terms with all persons.
Speak your truth quietly and clearly;
and listen to others, even the dull and ignorant;
they too have their story.

Avoid loud and aggressive persons;
they are vexatious to the spirit.
If you compare yourself with others,
you may become vain and bitter;
for always there will be greater and lesser persons than yourself.

Enjoy your achievements as well as your plans.
Keep interested in your own career,
however humble; it is a real possession in the changing fortunes of time. Exercise caution in your business affairs;
for the world is full of trickery.
But let this not blind you to what virtue there is;
many persons strive for high ideals;
and everywhere life is full of heroism.

Be yourself.
Especially do not feign affection.
Neither be cynical about love;
for in the face of all aridity and
disenchantment it is as perennial as the grass.

Take kindly the counsel of the years,
gracefully surrendering the things of youth.
Nurture strength of spirit to shield you in sudden misfortune.
But do not distress yourself with imaginings.

Many fears are born of fatigue and loneliness.
Beyond a wholesome discipline, be gentle with yourself.
You are a child of the universe;
no less than the trees and the stars, you have a right to be here.

And whether or not it's clear to you,
no doubt the universe is unfolding as it should.

Therefore be at peace with God,
whateveryou conceive God to be; a
nd whatever your labours and aspirations,
in the noisy confusion of life
keep peace with your soul.

With all its sham, drudgery and broken dreams,
it's still a beautiful world.
Be cheerful. Strive to be happy.

by Max Ehrman, 1927.

Read this again today and it was just what I needed to hear today so I thought I would pass it on......

Elimination

There always comes a time of elimination. The earth sheds each year. The trees and flowers let go of their identity. As the old identity dies, an new identity is born. The body sheds constantly. Some of it happens invisibly, so naturally and silently, that we don't realize it is happening. The heart and the spirit also shed. They shed they the emotions and experiences that we no longer need. They shed the things that stunt our growth. This, too, is an invisible process. Yet because of the energy involved, the emotional energy, we often feel the emotional and spiritual shedding. It feels as if we are dying. We are. Just like the flowers and the trees, we are dying to an old identity. This shedding, or death, is not the end of us. It is the beginning.

Taken from "Yesterday, I Cried" by Iyanla Vanzant

This is so fitting for my day today. When we shed the old and start our new way of life. Our new way of life effects those around us. Most of the time that is positive, but there are times when it is quiet negative. With my immediate family it has been mostly a positive experience with a few growing pains along the way. With my extended family the effects have been mixed. There are folks who are themselves actively in the disease and to accept me and my new way of life is just too painful for them. I hope and pray that someday there will be a relationship there and that they can find the gift of sobriety too. In life you have to learn to take the good with the bad. I am reminded of that tonight as I sit with my family and enjoy each other's company, sharing about our respective days. The phone rings and interrupts the conversation and I'm immediatly drawn into the uglier side of this disease. My 14 year old sponsee is on the phone and she is struggling everyday to stay clean and sober. We went to a meeting tonight and after I dropped her off she got physically assaulted by another member of her family who is in the throws of active addiction. The circle just goes around and around.......but for today I am in a place of peace and serenity in my life and I guess that is all I can hope for everyday.

40

There is something magical that occurs when a woman turns forty. She becomes more attractive in a sensual seductive way. It's not that her body gets better, but I think she becomes comfortable with her body and learns how to manuever it better. At forty, woman's eyes begin to sparkle. Not with lust or excitement, but with wisdom. She has seen some things, done some things and learned some things that show through her eyes. At forty, although there are things on a woman's body that lie down, at the same time, other things stand out. They become clear. At forty a woman finds her voice, gets her vision and her footing. When I turned forty I became to old to try to be someone else, so I stopped trying.

As I thought about it, I realized that I didn't have any sense at all until I turned forty. At twenty-three I thought I had the answers. At forty I realized I had no idea what the question was. My life coach once told me that whatever shows up in your life is the answer. Your job is to figure out the question. I have lived through many abrupt, harsh answers. At forty I was committed to remembering the question. For me, the main question I had lived my life trying to answer was, "Why can't people love me the way I want to be loved?" At forty the answer magically popped in my head. "Because you don't know how to love yourself!"

Taken from "Yesterday, I Cried" by Iyanla Vanzant

This part of the book really hit home for me. For a long time I dreaded turning forty. In fact I would always say, I'm celebrating the eleventh anniversary of my twenty-ninth birthday.......but in the past few months since my birthday came and went I am enjoying forty. This year so far has been one of tremendous growth and understanding, change and renewal, peace and serenity. I don't know why I dreaded it.....cause I am surely enjoying it. This is just another example of me focusing on the glass half empty when I should have been focusing on the glass half full!

Digging Below The Surface

Today's Thought

You are reading from the book Today's Gift.

In uplifting, get underneath.--George Ade

A sandpile in the summer is deceiving. The topmost sand burns hot on our feet. But as we push down toward the center, we come to a damp, cool place that soothes and oozes between our toes. The nature of most things is not revealed at the surface. Like the sandpile, many people and situations we encounter are, on the surface, downright uncomfortable. The reward is in digging deeper--to the essential goodness, the core or meaning, the true friend. It takes time, a little knowledge, and abundant trust that we will not be burned.

What have I discovered by digging a little lately?

I have been digging a lot lately. There has been some pain, a few tears, hurt and even anger. The rewards have made it worth it for I have been given, peace, serenity, understanding and compassion in return.

Pagan Serenity Prayer

Pagan Serenity Prayer

God and Goddess Grant Me

The power of Water, to accept with ease and grace what I cannot change.

The power of fire, for the Energy and courage to change the things I can.

The power of Air, for the ability to know the difference.

And the power of Earth, for the strength to continue my path