18 Months

Today makes 18 months clean and sober! Thanks to all of you who have offered a helping hand, support, and company as I trudge the road of happy destiny.

Anna's Anniversary

It's Anna's 11th Anniversary today. Stop over and wish her a wonderful day! Her link is over on the right under places I visit.

One Year

Today marks 365 days of continuous sobriety. It is a day that I once thought I would never see a second time. I am filled with gratitude. I wish first of all to thank my Higher Power, for it is only by his gift that I am sober today. I also wish to thank my family for standing by me through the better and the worse I have put them through. I want to thank the fellowship of AA for the support and guidance I have received. My Higher Power has come to me through so many people, but I am especially thankful for the sponsors I have been blessed with (Laurie, Meggers, Delilah). I am grateful for those I was blessed to give back to along the way (Ashley, Liam, Linda, Jackie, Lisa). I am grateful to the women in the fellowship who have been there to help when I have stumbled along the path (Jan, Tammy, Andrea, Jane, Jama, Alisa, Deann, Deb, Susan, Leisa, and so many more, especially my sobriety sister Sam). I owe thank you to my on-line family as well, especially those of you I have been fortunate to actually meet face to face (Anna, James, Tom, Suzan, Meg). You all have been a tremendous source of feedback and support. I am grateful especially for one gift, my mirror, my gift from my Higher Power (My Mable). You have taught me so much about how to live each day, humbly, following the path my Higher Power has chosen for me. You have taught me about loving myself, loving others and allowing them to love me. You have taught me so much about being a mother, wife, sister, daughter. Most importantly you have taught me the meaning of Honesty, Trust, Willingness, Openmindedness and recently Altruistic! I try to live my life today by those very principals. I owe you a ton for I know you would do anything for me! Although today is a milestone and I am truly grateful, I must remember that the only real gift I have been given is today. I am blessed to have had the opportunity to accept this gift more than once in my life. That is the thing I am most grateful for. So many never come to a place where they have the opportunity to accept the gift and use it to live. I am also very aware that this gift is mine to keep only if I freely give it to all who ask. Thank you for another day.

Did You Find Joy?

Did you find joy?

"The future, higher evolution will belong to those who live in joy, who share joy, and who spread joy."
-- Torkom Saraydarian

Joy, as the energy of love, is the highest vibration on this planet. Everything in the universe is energy; it can be measured and reduced to vibrational frequencies. It’s a universal law that as we think and feel we vibrate, and as we vibrate we attract. When we are in the high joy vibration, we attract what is for our greater good.

The Ancient Egyptians saw Joy as a sacred responsibility. They believed that upon their death, the God Osiris would ask them two questions: "Did you bring Joy?" and "Did you find Joy?" Those who answered ‘yes’ could continue their journey into the afterlife.

For at least the next week or two, ask yourself these two questions each and every day: Did I bring joy? Did I find joy?

"Man loves because he is Love. He seeks Joy, for he is Joy. He thirsts for God for he is composed of God and he cannot exist without Him."
-- Sathya Sai Baba

Today I have been clean and sober nine months. This time around it was much more difficult to get to this place. I believe it is because the first time through I sought the easier, softer way. Ultimately it did not work as I traveled from 18 months to zero without even really realizing what had happened. The biggest difference this time around is honesty. I am learning to be honest with others, but mostly with myself. I have faced fears rather than run from them or find a new way to bury them. One would think it is difficult to find joy when there have been many struggles and pain. However, it has been quite the oppisite. I have traveled throuh more difficulties and pain in this nine months than I did in 18 months before, but I have found way more peace, joy and Love than I ever thought possible. The last three months have been incredibly diffficult, but still I have found love and I have loved others, which is something I have found very little of before now. There are too many to thank for the support, example and strength.

Today I am grateful for:

• The love I have found in my family: Mike, Kim Steve, and Anna
• The love of true friends, something I never had before
• The support and family I have found in AA
• The ability to fulfill dreams instead of watching them pass by
• sobriety
• The ability to survive trials and tribulations
• ENOUGH, I have enough of all that I need
• The ability to share that which has been given me: materialistically, spiritually, sobriety and Love
• The ability to reach out and experience new things: I have been blessed to be able to travel and have met some incredible people (My Anna Poo; Jamesy Baby, Tom, Suzan, Meg) and many more to come
• Life today.