Wiilingness

Today's thought is:
When all is said and done, willingness is everything. --Frank D.

Most of us adult children know very well that recovery doesn't happen, nor is there any positive growth, unless we are first of all willing.

Sometimes we get confused over the difference between willing and wanting. We don't have to want, let alone enjoy, doing what needs to be done. Not wanting to do something is altogether different from not being willing to do it. As one recovering woman said, "Everything I ever let go of had claw marks all over it." The bottom line is that she did let go no matter how badly she wanted to hang on; she was willing.

Think of the people in the program we most admire, those whose progress seems so speedy compared to ours. They may very well not enjoy going out to meetings. They may find it uncomfortable to meet with their sponsors or to say kind words when they really want to complain. They may wish they didn't have to make amends to certain people. But druthers aren't the point. The point is that they are willing to do what it takes.

Today, I ask God to help me deepen my willingness to grow and to see the difference between what I want and what I will.

I am finally coming to that place in my life where I am willing to do what it takes to move forward. The people in the program that I most admire have shown me that the only way to freedom from that which enslaves me is though it, there is no way around it. With the help of my HP and those people I am ready to embrace my past, go through it and remove it's powerful hold on me. It is not what I want to do, but I'm willing to do it if it's necessary. This must begin with self care. It is something I struggle with, but for today, something I am willing to do.