Strength in God

If you are trusting in your own strength, you have every reason to be apprehensive, anxious and fearful. What can you predict or control? What is there in you that can be counted on? What would give you the ability to be aware of all the facets of any problem, and to resolve them in such a way that only good can come of it? What is there in you that gives you the recognition of the right solution, and the guarantee that it will be accomplished?

Of yourself you can do none of these things. To believe that you can is to put your trust where trust is unwarranted, and to justify fear, anxiety, depression, anger and sorrow. Who can put his faith in weakness and feel safe? Yet who can put his faith in strength and feel weak?

God is your safety in every circumstance. His Voice speaks for Him in all situations and in every aspect of all situations, telling you exactly what to do to call upon His strength and His protection. There are no exceptions because God has no exceptions.....

....There is a place in you where there is perfect peace. There is a place in you where nothing is impossible. There is a place in you where the strength of God abides.

ACIM Lesson 47

I was on my way to work today......ranting and raving about all the things I had control over. My bestest friend Anna just listened politely and asked me....have you read the lesson for the day? Of course I had not. I went onto work and took care of the amends that my sponsor suggested I needed to do in order to clean up my side of the street from earlier this week. I did that, which was by no means an easy thing, and has put my job at risk. On the way to meet with my sponsor, I called Anna again to let her know how my morning went. She had grown impatient with me by then and read the lesson of the day to me.....Man did it hit me right square between the eyes. If my strength had been in the my Higher Power this week I wouldn't be in the mess I am in. However, I have taken the action necessary to fix this, I have a plan in place and if I place my strength in my Higher Power now it will be okay. My Ego screamed so loud the last few days and made it nearly impossible for me to take the actions necessary to fix this mess. That is exactly what this reading is talking about.......I can trust in a Power greater than myself.....or I can let fear and ego guide me. Today I chose a Higher Power.

Thanks for all your experience, strength, hope, patience and friendship Mable. I am happy that I can offer so much humor to your day!

The 9th Step Promises & My Dad

Yesterday I received an incredible gift. I have been chipping away at my 9th step and have come to a place where the list is nearly completed. Those left on the list are ones that I am simply waiting for an opportunity to arise, or they are ones that I am willing to do but may never have the opportunity as the other party at this point is unwilling to hear them. I can read the promises an P.83 and P.84 in the Big Book and understand them as they are actually happening in my life.

The gift I received yesterday is proof that they are coming true for me. Back in early Feb. I made my amends with my father. At the time he didn't say much. I suppose he needed time to process what I said. Yesterday I received a letter in the mail from him. In that letter he stated that he feels his life is complete, that he has received all that he needs. He went on to state that he is proud of me and who I am becoming. He said that he is proud of the way I have changed my life, which is comformation for me that my actions are being seen and recognized. He went on to say that he is proud of the way that my husband and I have raised our kids. That alone was an incredible statement, as I have for a long time felt as though he was judging me in that department, which turns out to not be the case at all. He went on to acknowledge the things I have done in my past and to apologize himself for not being a father during much of my childhood. He ran from the disease and therefore ran from his responsiblities as a father. My father told me that the past is the past and we can't change it, but rather learn from it and do the right thing from this day forward. Somehow that helped bring me to that promise of not regreting the past, nor wishing to shut the door on it. He finished the letter with the statement, "I am honored to call you my daughter." This letter is one of those gifts of sobriety, a fulfillment of the promises, that I never imagined possible when I began this journey. I am truly blessed, I feel as though I have the greatest father in the world.

This program really works, if you work it!